No matter where it comes from, criticism can hurt, elicit anger, and a plethora of other feelings. Here are five ways to deal with it that will lessen it's impact.
1. Apologize
You "aren't" admitting you did anything wrong by simply saying "I'm sorry." You are, however, showing your regret that a conflict or misunderstanding is occurring.
2. Agree
This is actually a good response, especially if you feel the criticism is not valid or is overly harsh. If the criticism is valid however, just admit your responsibility and apologize. You might agree by saying, "You're right, John, I did have an irritated tone in my voice when I answered the phone." If pressed, give a BRIEF explanation and move on.
3. Share Your Perspective
If you do not agree with the criticism and want to "get into it," share how you see things from your side. Often it is better to wait awhile after hearing the criticism before doing this, or you'll risk coming off as being "defensive." Give it some time and then state your side.
4. Mend The Fence
If you did or said something deserving of the criticism, think about what you can now say or do to "mend fences" with the other party(s). If you are not sure what to do or say, ask the person, "What can I do or say to make this up to you or to help make things better between us?"
5. Set Some Boundaries
Use this technique when you get criticism in an abusive manner. Even if you did do something to warrant some criticism, you have the right to put limits on how you are treated! Be polite, clear, and firm when you state your boundaries. Make sure they are clear and reasonable.
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